Indian Food. But is it really?

I ate Indian Food today from some place called Indian House or Indian Palace or Indian Playground -- it doesn't matter. What's important is that I didn't immediately have explosive diarrhea and was able to calmly walk into the bathroom and relieve myself like a normal human. What I'm not certain about is whether it was the source of the food or a growing tolerance to the wiles of this ever foreign cuisine.

Maybe there truly is a world beyond naan, a glorious palindrome and the sponge for my chicken tikka masala. Still, how can one country, which hold the cow as sacred above all others, use so much damn dairy? Cheese, cream, milk, yogurt; I'm sure there's a dish which contains all three four of these ingredients. Personally, I think people like this stuff because it's not really spicy, but has some kind of flavor and it's like eating fried ice cream but you can pretend it's healthy because it's ethnic. Any way you put it, it's always a pass for me, but sometimes you have to swallow your creamy, cheese curd filled fried yogurt milk potatoes and smile, or else they won't call you when they're going to eat real food like Lou Malnati's pizza.